I watched the "This I Believe" speech called,
"Speak Now, or Forever Hold Your Peace". This essay told about how a
young girl's father died in a motorcycle accident. He was hit by a woman
driver. She then resorted to cutting herself, and was diagnosed with manic
depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. This story was very emotional to
me, even though I haven't experienced a death in my immediate family. It made
me think about what I would do, how I would think, and how I would act, if
someone close to me passed away and I couldn't say goodbye. As she was telling
the story, it was very hard for me to believe she wasn't crying. It was a
really moving story, and very sad. Personally, I have a very bad relationship
with my dad, from years and years of neglect and non-compassionate fathering.
Hearing this story put an image in my head of someday having my dad die, and
not ever being able to apologize for how I acted, to hear him apologize for all
those years. It reminded that even though I may hate how he acts, every second
of every day, he's still my father and I wish he would have acted more of one,
because as it stands I wouldn't mind if he was gone. I notice this sounds bad,
but with my own experiences with him it's really not very hard to believe. If I
were to lose my mom however, I would never be able to recuperate! My mom is the
coolest mom ever and she has always helped me through everything I've ever
needed help with, or even with things I didn't know I needed help with.
Hearing
this story made me incorporate it into my own life, and made it a part of me.
Not many things instantly trigger my past, and my life that I used to live,
that's why I chose to do a reflection on this individual essay.
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